Mid Life Crisis is so over.
In fact, the crisis shifted to the earlier generation called : "Young adults"
It's what I defined as "The transition between youth and adulthood, young adulthood is the stage where we learn to become fully mature adults. or simply "Not-a-girl-not-yet-a-woman" for ladies, "Not-a-boy-not-yet-a-man" for gentlemen.
You got the dreaded question at the back of your mind :"What's Next?"
As much as I love to answer that, Im too, stuck at that question.
It's like, after 15 over years of shelter of education since kindergarden, you are now officially being thrown into the ocean..where it's big and wide, drifting you anywhere at any direction. You feel lost, scared, fearful of the unknown.. and perhaps all you do, is to continue drifting, hoping someone would drop down from heaven to save you...
wait a second....
*Ah bish* slaps myself. "Snap out of it Clara. Have you forgotten you are already SAVED? His, whose blood He uses to save your precious life, gives you life and the best part is, let you have the freedom to choose your life..."
Yah, snap out of it. I am holding too tightly to the fear of the unknown that I fail to see the current beautiful painting that God has always, and will always paint out for me.
Main Lesson Number 2: "Let Go"
Let go of wanting to know about the unknown and the future, and trust in Him to lead the way.
I like this passage in the book, What the Heck am I going to do with my life?
"I think the more I feel I don't know, the more I know God knows...its a reassuring feeling. I am not going to say that there is never frustration or anxiety in the unknown, but it is encourageing for me to know that God has a purpose for my life and if I am daily striving to know him and live for him, he will show me in his perfect timing.."
What was I thinking? Instead of focusing on God and His everything, I am focusing on myself and My everything. If I want to work for God and fulfill His purpose, I should follow Him, focus on Him and find Him. Wow... it makes sense. I want to work for God. Not for myself, so why hold on to so much control? Let Go Clara...
...
My number 1 lesson, I felt I really was called to learn and still am, is Patience. Time always seem too short for me to learn everything and do everything. My eagerness sometimes drains me because the more you expect things to happen, the more disappointments you get. In the end, I get a compromise out of life. My driving lessons are cut mid way, I still haven got to learn that Photoshop thing, I haven bake the whole of my holiday break~! and and... you see...
But Patience has taught me to not rush time. There are gains and losses. God teaches us to be grateful for both blessings and adversities. He gives and He takes away. I may not had done many, but I had gain many too. Over the holidays I learn to skate (in other directions other than forward), had many fellowships and friends who bless me with treats, came out with a full aerobics routine, did night cycling, had great picnics... =)
I should be content. Why shouldn't I? There is a time for everything,
Life will be short-changed if you are too eager to change everything in life.
I am not saying by letting go, I am drifting. I rather think myself as a boat on a adventure, not knowing where to go, but there is a captain on board, who nagivates the way, and whom already had a destination in mind, while I do the work. Along the way, there are rain and storms, but there are also beautiful sunsets and sea creatures to see, and I bring people across seas, rescue people from deserted islands, receive aid from bigger ships.... until, i too, reach my eternal destination...
Thank you. Captain.
Live well people.
I apologise if my post today seems a little disorganised. I am really writing from my heart as it feels like saying.
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